So all three kids were playing in the girls bedroom. I told my older two- Drew and Ella, I needed them to watch Lucy for a few minutes while Mommy was busy. Both children said yes. Both children heard me review the rules. Yet as I walked out of the bedroom little Lulu followed me. Neither Drew or Ella even noticed. So I thought forget it- and off Lulu and I went to work on laundry. Lulu always likes to "help" with laundry. So sweet- pulls clothes out of dryer and off she runs throughout the house. Well this time I took all the clothes out and set on top of washer so would not have to chase down missing pieces. So I'm working away folding and hanging clothes. Lu is right by my feet just messing around. Or so I thought. I turned to put something away- and wouldn't you know it- I forget a pair of pajamas in the dryer. Only problem was- those cute little jammies were on my little monster. Yup- Lulu climbed in the dryer. Please do not turn me into CPS- I did not put her in the dryer- I simply forgot to close the dang door. Cute as a button Lulu just grinned and giggled at her new discovery.
Now this simple event could have went many ways...
Reaction 1- I could have freaked out about the horrible things that could have happened. Along with this I can totally beat myself up and convince myself I'm the worse mother ever. Forgetting all the things I have ever done right and focusing completely on this mistake. I could compare myself to other moms who would never let this happen, thus believing I would never be good enough for my kids. I can go on...
Reaction 2- I could remove her from the dryer- firmly tell her no. Move on...
Reaction 3- I could have left her there- went and asked her big brother and big sister how things were going and is Lucy ok... then make them hunt for her.
Reaction 4- Take a picture as I laugh my heart out. Focusing on the silliness of the situation. Remind myself no parent is perfect. Kids will be kids. One year olds curriousity will conqure any parenting skills.
Guess which one I chose. I know kind of hard- they all sound like me. In the past I definetly would have chose reaction 1. Would have felt like a failure at the simplest mistake. But not this time. I chose reaction 4. I was so surprised all I could do was laugh. And boy did I giggle. I know probably not the best choice. But ya know what... I don't care anymore. I admit- I am not the Mom of the year, but I am the Mom God called me to be. Broken and flawed but full of love for my kids. And that is what they need. God is working in me- breaking down walls of guilt and failure I have created. See that is what a lot of us do as parents. Compare our self to John and Susie's mom. Carefully pointing out all the things she does right- without a clue of her actual screw ups. Because trust me- John and Susie's mom is not as picture perfect as you paint her. And nor is their father- sure his yard might be perfectly mowed and car polished and shiny- prob playing catch with Johnny and teaching little Susie to ride her bike at the same time- blah blah blah- Super Dad. It's just nonsense. You know what my sister taught my son to ride is his bike without training wheels. Sweetest dang thing ever- munchkin practiced forever secretly to surprise me on my birthday. Does that make his Dad or Stepdad less of a Dad- NOPE. Does that make me less of a mom- heck no. I finally get it- still beat myself up sometimes. But I'm learning to just be me. Do what I can and not condemn myself for what I cannot. One of the best pieces of advice I have heard is that God does not call the qualified, he qualifes the called. See God did not make me a mom because I am qualifed to be one. God qualifes me in my calling. He meets me at my weakest points and carries me thru. Without Him- I could not do it. Parenting is insanely hard! It's also insanely worth it. But it is no walk in the park. I cannot imagine how anyone could be a parent without their heavenly Father sharing that journey. Anyways I'm rambling.
Lesson learned: Kids will be kids. No parent is perfect. Enjoy the journey- but do not forget to notice the importance of your Father's guidance.
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